I am Cannibal
by HowlsGirl41790
Summary: I have descovered a way to make us together forever, brother. There's just one little thing, you have to die.  Rated M for cannibalism.


Author's Note: Yay! Another songfic! This particular one is loosely based on the song Cannibal by Ke$ha, and no, I do not own the rights to the song. Italics are song lyrics and regular type is Belarus. This story is told from her POV only and I put some time markers so that no one would get confused about when time had jumped to the future. BE WARNED: there is cannibalism in this fic, so if that's not your cup of tea, feel free to hit the back button, I won't be offended. I do not own Hetalia or any of its affiliates. Comments and constructive criticism are always welcome; flamers will be burned at the stake with their own flames.

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><p><span>I am Cannibal<span>

_I have a heart I swear I do  
>But just not baby when it comes to you<br>I get so hungry when you say you love me  
>If you know what's good for you<br>I think you're hot I think you're cool  
>You're the kinda guy I'd stalk in school<br>But now that I'm famous, you're up my anus  
>Now I'm gonna eat you fool!<br>_

Oh dearest brother…Do you remember when we were young, and you complained to Ukraine that I was 'stalking' you? I wasn't stalking you brother, you know how hard it's been for me to show anyone love… It always made me so happy—and slightly hungry—when you would tell me that you loved me too, brother. And now, I know why. I will make us one. We will be together forever. I found a way to make us one, but, sadly, you will have to die. But don't be afraid or worry, because I shall not let you go to waste.

_I eat boys up, breakfast and lunch  
>Then when I'm thirsty, I drink their blood<br>Carnivore, animal, I am a Cannibal  
>I eat boys up, you better run<br>I am Cannibal  
>I am Cannibal (I'll eat you up)<br>I am Cannibal  
>I am Cannibal (I'll eat you up)<em>

**10 Days later:**

I did try to get away from you, brother. And do you know what I discovered? That you and I were meant to be one from the beginning! I found a way that we could be together that would satisfy my other cravings… I'm going to eat you brother, and when I do, we shall become closer than ever! Our souls will combine and become one! So, I shall do it tonight. I shall end your life, so that you may blend with mine and become one with me. I will eat your body, and we shall be together forever!

Whenever you tell me I'm pretty  
>That's when the hunger really hits me<br>You're little heart goes pitter patter  
>I want your liver on a platter<br>Use your finger to stir my tea  
>and for dessert I'll suck your teeth<br>Be too sweet and you'll be a goner  
>I'll pull a Jeffrey Dahmer<p>

**1 Month Later:**

As I sit here now and think of you, I wonder if you felt any pain. After all, I did stab you in your sleep. Fifty-five times, I think it was… At any rate, your fingers make for good spoons and I've found that fried liver tastes really good with some kidney. Carving you up wasn't really all that hard, brother. It just took a little bit of effort, and now, all of your servants serve you to me. I think I shall eat the rest of your shoulders today, I haven't really decided yet. I have decided that I'm going to have to move your body soon, you're starting to look patchy and I wouldn't want people seeing you like this; after all, there are chunks missing everywhere…

I eat boys up, breakfast and lunch  
>Then when I'm thirsty, I drink their blood<br>Carnivore, animal, I am a Cannibal  
>I eat boys up, you better run<br>I am Cannibal  
>I am Cannibal (I'll eat you up)<br>I am Cannibal  
>I am Cannibal (I'll eat you up)<p>

**2 Months Later:**

Oh, big brother Russia… There are some days when I look to my mantelpiece and see your head that I mounted there, and I truly miss you. Those are the days when I eat a little more of you than I should. I'm trying to make you last, so that, when the time comes, I can truthfully say that you and I are one. Your head isn't looking so good these days… Sadly, the pieces that I've already taken out of it have caused it to droop somewhat. The eyes are missing and I ate your nose yesterday… Your teeth are such a wonderful snack to suck on. The skin around your hairline, I'll remove that tomorrow and perhaps I'll start weaving your beautiful hair into some of the other meals of you…

_I am Cannibal  
>I am Cannibal (I'll eat you up)<br>I am Cannibal  
>I am Cannibal (I'll eat you up)<em>

I love you  
>I warned you<br>ROAR

**4 Months Later:**

I remember how I used to believe that we could become one if you would marry me, brother… How foolish that was. All I needed to do was consume you and you would be a part of me forever. I had your skull cleaned yesterday, I never go anywhere without it. I can't believe I made you last for nearly three months! Other countries don't have any dealings with me anymore, but that's ok, brother, because I have you, and I know you'll never leave me. I love you, brother, and now we are together forever.

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><p>Author's Note, part II: So, this is a birthday fic for my bestest friend cookiesquee! I really hope she enjoys this and hope that her birthday is the best one to date!<p> 


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